i'm much worse, now, thanks

now i have three more betrayals to keep my mind at disease.
dis ease and disease. same word. different pronunciation. same meaning, in my book.

so how do i sleep and be at peace now?
i want to screw you all. and i don't mean fucking.
i feel raped, pillaged and disposed of as convenient.

thinking hurts more than before
when i can think straight at all
you learned nothing, all this time.

the friends, nothing
the parents, nothing

i'm much much worse, now, thanks so much
for adding to the mental disease i cannot wash out.